Assertiveness skills are an essential part of the 21st century
workplace 'tool kit'. But just what is assertiveness? I have often
heard people refer to a colleague as being SO assertive - what they
mean is this person is bordering on being aggressive. Being assertive
is NOT being aggressive. Assertiveness is knowing, and acting upon,
the fact that we all have rights and at the same time observing the
rights of others. It's a two way street.
Assertiveness is firstly and most importantly understanding and
demonstrating the fact that YOU are in control of YOU. Sometimes
easier said than done. Keep in mind however that 'we teach others how
we want to be treated'. For example, if my colleagues know that I am
so passive I am unable to say 'no' to an overload of work, some of
them will quickly learn to ask me to do a particular task before they
ask my more assertive or aggressive colleagues.
Three key steps in being more assertive are:
- Decide what you want (be specific, don't use generalities, write
it down for yourself if necessary)
- Say it clearly and specifically (practise at home or with a
trusted colleague if this is a large and important issue for you,
avoid accusing words, use 'I' language, avoid negative labels)
- Support what you say by how you say it (remember you also send
strong messages with your tone of voice and your body language, so
make sure all the signals - words, tone of voice, body language -
are sending the SAME message
There are NUMEROUS techniques to assist you in maximising your
assertiveness 'tool kit' in the workplace.
Realisations Consultancy can help you learn more about assertiveness
and a course can be tailored to meet your requirements.
Please contact Dr Genevieve Armson (08) 9470 2662 or
genevieve@realisations.com.au
